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Dog Days Ahead...

uglydrunksmile

Going Off Course - Dave Schutz is a really nice guy. He is also the recently appointed director of the Life Time Fitness Minneapolis Triathon and the founder/director of Trinona, which was named 2010 Triathletes Choice Race of the Year. He has a smoking hot wife and rad son named Kaler, age 14 months.

Life is good, right?....

Paper or Plastic?

dolanGoing Off Course - "Paper or plastic?" he asked the adipose woman with orange hair, painted-on eyebrows and a smudge of Twinkie cream on the corner of her heavily lipsticked mouth. His tone was both pleasant and businesslike. He was a professional; the #1 bagger at Hy-Vee's South Lucust Street location in Dubuque.

The oblivious woman didn't answer. Her groceries, almost $600's worth so far, were piling up on the conveyor belt.

"Excuse me, ma'am. Would you prefer paper or plastic?" Outwardly, The Bagger was in control. Internally, he was becoming frantic. Groceries had begun to spill onto the floor. The scene resembled an episode of "I Love Lucy."...

EVEN MORE MAD LOVE...

loveFREE LOVE, FREE SWAG and AFFECTIONATE DISCOUNTS (FINAL WEEK)

By Darin Wieneke

During the month of L-O-V-E, MTN has tried to show its love and affection to our readers by way of free love, swag and affectionate discounts. While this is the final week we will be giving away free swag and discounts, we wanted you to know that we will still cherish you when the flowers of spring appear, when the summer air is filled with heat, when the leaves turn gold in the fall and when winter

Chris' Mind Dump...

predatorsBy Chris Hawes

I was asked about to write a review of the worst movie I have ever seen, and it turned into a stream of consciousness mind dump. Also, what is good and what is bad, when it comes to things like books, movies, music, is subjective. To an extent. There are some movies, songs, books, that a majority of people agree are bad. It is hard for me to say what is the "worst" movie I have seen. I have seen plenty of bad movies and they all kind of get bundled together. We all know, as long as movies are being made, there will be bad ones, and there will be "worst" (Worser? Not a word, but who cares) ones.

So, if I offend someone, too bad, it is just my opinion. With that being said, the first movie that came to mind is Scary Movie. Why? When it came out on video I rented it and got tired of watching it before it was over. I just thought it was dumb and not funny enough to wade through, so I quit....

Rastafarian Proctologists & Walking With a Lisp...

neologismLast week totally cool, insanely articulate triathlete and recent featuree in a "Going Off Course" post, Steve Paladie, sent us the list of winners if the Washington Post's "Neologisms Contest." Steve claims to actually know what a neologism is. He steadfastly maintains that he didn't have to Google the term.

We didn't have to Google it either. But we did anyway.

ne

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